17 January 2005

Day 2

Well, they say the first 2 days are the hardest... so I can honestly say.... THANK GOD thats over with!!

Got off to a fairly good start... managed to curb the cravings for the better part of the day... cleaned, cooked, and played the efficient non smoking housewife!

And then trouble came home...in a strop... why are you making lasagne?! You KNOW I hate lasagne! Wot am I supposed to eat?!?

I had made a HUGE lasagne... which I dont make often because of his likes and dislikes...but I just couldnt face another spaghetti bolegnaisse... so I made my next best dish. Daniel refuses to eat, Barry refuses to eat, Sash has eaten at her friends house...and so...there I am.... tucking into my deliscious dish on my own thinking....

"wot the fuck did I fuckin waste my time making this fuckin food for if nobody fuckin eats it, well fuck em if they dont wanna eat wot I cook then they can all fuckin starve!"

You know wot guys...I love u....but I seriously CANT deal with this shit today! This was the point when I started walking in circles...ciggie, ciggie, ciggie, help, ciggie, i....need.....a......fuckin fag...NOW!!

I looked at Barry, my eyes presumably protruding from my head and my hair transformed into little hissing snakes...."u ok?" he said.....Um.... I am seriously NOT COPING right now!!

My rock sauntered his bright shiney coat of armour over to me, wrapped his strong warm arms around my frail and shaking body and whispered....

Its ok, youre ok, just hold on...you'll be ok. We're doing this!

And so ends the second smoke free day!


1 comment:

AmericaSide said...

Good for you, cheers on ya, other positive sayings...
Now dad might not have to explain to the kids why mom's dead...
"She just loved smoking more than you guys".

If you're having trouble, just picture dad having that conversation with a child.

Love to all, from AmericaSide