Today was one of those days that I did something which I thought would prove to be a productive lesson in forethought for my 10yr old daughter, Sasha-Lee.
Going back to my schooling years I recall how homework provided on a friday, was always left till sunday night to be done...that or sunday night was spent thinking up excuses to be given to the teacher the following day on why I just couldn't do my homework. Sometimes I would leave my books at home 'purposely by mistake' or I would create some wierd and wonderful story of cats knocking over my drink all over my work, or perhaps...this was a good one... I was in a car that caught fire and I had to jump out leaving my school bag in the burning vehicle.
I was brilliant at streeeeeeeeeeeeeetching the truth. I WAS in a car...it HAD started smoking....we DID jump out....I DID leave my bag in it....but....there was NO fire, and my bag and all its contents were TOTALLY in tact! But hey...if u got it...use it!
I see so many similar traits in Sashi, whenever we have this discussion of doing homework, she comes out with the arguements and reasons why she couldn't do it any sooner than sunday night.
Today I thought....aha! I am gonna take a different stance, try a different tactic to the usual rantings which seem to happen every weekend. Daniel, my 6 yr old son had a party to go to, it was a movie party, Shark Tale! And so I put my plan into action...
Shortly before we left to take Danny to his party, I asked Sash if she had any homework for the weekend to which she nodded in confirmation. My response was a calm acknowledgement. We left for the party and dropped him at the movies. "Oh please mom....can we also go to a movie!!" Sash pleaded... My response was just as calm..." u know Sash, had u done your homework on friday afternoon like ur supposed to.... I would have been happy to take u to a movie..... infact I was kinda planning to if u had done ur homework, but seeing as u havent...Im afraid we have to go home so you can get it done now"
Thats when it kicked in!! U calculating bitch!! I thought to myself.... how could u take this and practically rub her nose in it.
She cried bitterly, "why didnt u tell me earlier that u wanted to take me to movies?!??! I would have done my homework if I had known!!"
Because my sweet darling prescious child, I need you to learn something from this experience... I need you to learn to get the shit stuff out of the way as soon as possible so that when the cool stuff comes up, theres is NOTHING holding you back from enjoying it. I need you to learn that sometimes it isnt the incentive that creates the motivation, but the motivation that creates the incentive.
I love you SO so much my baby, it broke my heart to see you cry, it tore away my flesh to see your feeling of betrayal and frustration. I so want to say to you, stuff the homework, lets go to the movies!!!
You came home and did your homework, your sadness gone, you even sang "carwash" whilst doing your science experiments. Im not proud of wot I did, but I am proud of how you handled it!!